10 Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts or Gestures
Thoughtful sympathy gifts can provide a measure of comfort to someone who is struggling with the loss of a loved one. Learn which sympathy gifts are appropriate for expressing care when words are hard to come by.
Table of Contents
- Introduction
- Common Yet Typically Unwelcome Sympathy Gifts
- 10 Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts
- Thoughtful Gestures Make a World of Difference
- About Opal Cremation
- FAQs
- Additional Resources
Key Takeaways
- Thoughtful sympathy gifts can provide comfort in times of grief, but finding the ideal items can be difficult.
- Families may not appreciate some commonly given sympathy gifts, making it even more challenging to determine what’s best.
- It is best to give gifts that are comforting and practical. Meal delivery, home services, blankets, candles, and gestures like memorial gardens and cremation keepsakes are often welcome.
Introduction
The days and weeks following a loss can be incredibly emotional and challenging for everyone involved. For Los Angeles and Orange County families navigating grief, it’s not easy to find the words that provide comfort. A practical, sincere, and personal gift may ease their pain and appropriately express your sympathy.
This article recommends 10 thoughtful sympathy gifts that offer comfort during grieving.
Common Yet Typically Unwelcome Sympathy Gifts
Before diving into gifts that you should give, let’s explore some items that are often gifted but may be unwanted.
- Flowers: While they are nice, many grieving family members are bombarded with flowers, leaving them feeling overwhelmed. Some say they would prefer not to receive something that will die in a short amount of time when they are already immersed in grief over a loss.
- Keepsakes with Pictures of the Deceased: These highly personal items may seem insensitive or impractical in the early stages of grief.
- Gifts Requiring Effort or Assembly: When processing a loss, family members often lack the energy to assemble products.
- Generic Food Items: Families are often overwhelmed by food after losing a loved one. Instead, consider sending gift cards for food delivery services so they can order when they’re ready.
- Religious Items: These can seem pushy, especially if you don’t know the family’s religion. They may also carry undertones of ‘everything happens for a reason.’
In some cases, families will send an announcement stating exactly what they would prefer. Check the obituary first to see if they wrote something like, “In lieu of flowers, please donate to our favorite charity.”
If you can’t find the obituary, try checking the funeral home website or calling the funeral home directly. They may have information regarding the family’s preferences. Do the detective work yourself before reaching out to the family directly. They will likely be consumed with funeral arrangements.
After donating on the deceased’s behalf, mail a card to the family with the details of the contribution.
10 Thoughtful Sympathy Gifts
Here are some more appropriate gift items:
1. A Blanket
Blankets provide comfort during times of grief. Consider gifting a soft, warm blanket that replaces a hug when emotions overwhelm. You can even take it to the next level with a Blanket Gift Basket that includes socks, a candle, tea, a mug, and a chocolate bar.
2. Plan a Celebration of Life Event
Funerals can be an incredibly somber experience. You can help your friend or relative do something special for their loved one by planning a celebration of life event. Southern California’s mild climate and abundance of beautiful venues make it an ideal setting for these meaningful gatherings. The event can be a small gathering at the loved one’s favorite bar or a more formal event at an event hall.
Simply doing an activity that the loved one enjoyed can help keep their spirit alive and help support your friend or relative who is grieving.
3. Sympathy Ice Cream
Although generic food items may not be the best sympathy gift, ice cream may put a smile on their face—especially if it’s eCreamery’s sympathy ice cream. According to a Michigan University study, ice cream is a popular treat for people who are down in the dumps because it triggers feel-good hormones like dopamine and serotonin. The delicious flavors and smooth texture also make it hard to resist.
4. A Charitable Donation
Many families ask relatives to make donations to their loved one’s favorite charity after they pass, rather than sending flowers. It’s an easy way to show you care and aligns with the family’s wishes. If no charity is recommended, consider donating to a nonprofit the deceased cared about and letting the family know a gift was made in their name.
5. Plan and Plant a Memorial Garden
Provide a place of healing for those in mourning by creating a memorial garden. A memorial garden can be a public or private space where you plant flowers and other greenery to commemorate your lost loved one. Southern California’s year-round growing climate makes memorial gardens a particularly meaningful and lasting gift for families in the region. You can also even scatter the person’s ashes in the garden if you’d like, provided you are mindful of federal and local regulations on ash scattering.
6. Create a Cremation Keepsake
Families remember loved ones in unique ways, such as memorial diamonds and parting stones. Consider offering these keepsakes to the family if cremation occurs. Of course, this is a delicate gift, and you will need the families’ full approval. However, depending on the situation, it could be the ideal way to commemorate a loved one.
7. Children’s Grief Books
Sending grief books to adults may be inappropriate, as it assumes they need guidance on handling grief. However, sending a children’s book may be helpful, especially if it’s gifted directly to the child. It will help them understand death and process their feelings.
8. Sending a Hug Gift Box
When you can’t be there in person to support your friend, sending a hug in the form of this gift box can help. The box contains scented soaps and candles for your friend or relative who’s grieving. It will soothe and relax them, possibly lifting their mood.
9. Glass Keepsake Jar with Sympathy Messages
When you can’t find the words to say, express sympathy for your friend in the form of this Glass Keepsake Jar with inspirational messages to help those grieving find solace and acceptance. The jar contains 31 notes, and you can choose the design. You can make this gift more personal by gathering friends and loved ones and encouraging them to write their own notes.
10. A Memorial Lantern
Show them the flicker in their heart will never go out with this Memorial Lantern. In addition to a Celebration of Life inscription, it also contains the symbols of red cardinals, which signify our loved ones watching over us.
10. A Memorial Lantern
Show them the flicker in their heart will never go out with this Memorial Lantern. In addition to a Celebration of Life inscription, it features red cardinals, symbols of our loved ones watching over us.
“The best sympathy gift I received after my husband passed away was food delivery and home services. I had close friends and family send food for about a month. There were also several people who stepped up and sent gift cards for Molly Maid, and my yard work was prepaid. The best of all is that someone paid for me to have my front yard and porch landscaped and labeled it a Zen Garden. It made me so happy to see a beautiful landscape when I came home each day.”
Jennis Beverly Chaffold- Quora User
Gift Idea Table
The following table sums up our 10 thoughtful sympathy gifts.
| Gift Idea | Description | Benefits |
| Blanket | A soft, warm blanket which may be combined with other comforting elements like candles, tea, and a chocolate bar | Provides comfort and warmth during difficult times |
| Celebration of Life Event | Assist in planning to celebrate the loved one’s life | Helps keep the loved one’s spirit alive and supports the grieving process |
| Sympathy Ice Cream | Specially curated ice cream | Triggers feel-good hormones to elevate mood during grieving |
| Charitable Donation | A donation to the loved one’s favorite charity | Honors a meaningful cause and replaces disposable gifts |
| Memorial Garden | Planning or planting a memorial garden in the loved one’s honor | Provides a place for families to honor their loved one’s spirit while providing environmentally friendly and beneficial activities |
| Cremation Keepsake | Keepsakes include parting stones, jewelry, and gems | A loved one’s memory can live on through these items |
| Children’s Grief Books | Books that teach children about loss | Helps children process grief while helping adults explain death |
| Hug Gift Box | Gifts boxes that include scented soaps and candles | Provides comfort during times of grief |
| Glass Keepsake Jar | Jar with 31 sympathy notes from friends and family. | Let’s families know their loved one is remembered |
| Memorial Lantern | Lantern with a celebration of life inscription | Symbolizes eternal remembrance and presence of loved ones |
Thoughtful Gestures Make a World of Difference
While navigating someone else’s grief can be uncomfortable, it’s important to be there for your friend or relative in their time of need. Feeling uncomfortable for a bit is a small price to pay for letting your loved one know you care and that they are not alone. Death is an unfortunate aspect of life, and if you’re there for someone in their time of need, whether it’s through thoughtful gifts or by lending a listening ear, hopefully someone will be there for you, too, when you experience loss.
Have you just heard about a death that happened months or even years ago? Sending a gift can still be beneficial and will not rehash grief.
Grief is an ongoing process, so gifts are always a comfort. They let the family know their loved one is still remembered and reminds them they still have a support system. A gift that comes later can also be perceived as thoughtful rather than obligatory.
About Opal Cremation
Opal Cremation of Southern California knows that losing a loved one is an overwhelming experience. That’s why we make it our goal to help Los Angeles and Orange County family and friends navigate one of the most difficult times you can go through in life. We offer an all-inclusive package that can be customized to each family’s needs.
We’re also happy to make arrangements for direct cremation in Los Angeles over the phone with a dedicated care team to guide you through every step of the process. Our team is ready to help you 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Call us at 888-963-2299.
You can also check out our support center for cremation FAQs and other helpful resources or contact us online to learn more about our comprehensive services.
FAQs
What is a comforting gesture?
In addition to gifts, you may want to offer a comforting gesture to a grieving friend or relative. A hug, a squeeze of the hand, or a steady arm around your shoulders can be appropriate.
What do grieving people want to hear?
It can be challenging to know what to say, but phrases like “I’m sorry for your loss” and “I wish I had the right words” can be helpful.
Is it necessary to include a card or note with a sympathy gift?
Yes, a card and note should be included because they personalize the gesture and allow you to express your condolences.
Additional Resources
- How to Process Grief: 5 Important Things to Know
- Create a Heartfelt Tribute: How to Plan a Memorial Garden
- How to Plan an Unforgettable Celebration of Life Service
- What is Cremation Jewelry: Find Out How to Preserve Memories and Keep Your Loved One Close
- As Unique as Your Loved One: 7 Thoughtful DIY Memorial Keepsake Ideas
